She swallowed hard. James. How could she have not remembered James? "I... no. I wouldn't want you to tell him that. I care for him a great deal. It's just..."

What was it just?

"I want to see him again. I wish he could be here."

Now she was torn. To be in a place where she was happy and wanted, but never see James again or go back where she almost always felt out of place and knew she'd probably never be allowed to go home again.

"I don't know," she said finally, feeling a bit hopeless. "I don't know what to do."